Unsystematic Denial

I am most disappointed to learn that a Jumbuck, is indeed, a sheep.



Baa.

Labels: general

#104383 +(10191)- [X]

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
--------------
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something



how true

Labels: funnies

Forgiving or punishing the terrorists is left to God.

But fixing their appointment with God is our responsibility.

- The Sri Lanka Army -

Labels: general

...and my dratted cough just won't ease up.




Snakes on a plane are not nearly as bad as Waterpolo...with Sharks!

Labels: musings

I LOVE SHIPS AND HARBOURS AND PORTS AND ALL STUFF LIKE THAT AND I CLIMBED ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP OF A RUBBER TYRED GANTRY AND IT WAS SO COOL AND I ALMOST SLIPPED AND DIED BUT THAT WAS OKAY BECAUSE I WOULD HAVE DIED HAPPY AND IT WAS SO COOL AND WONDERFUL AND THE LIMITED SAFETY WALKWAYS AND GREASY LADDERS WERE SO MARITIME LIKE AND IT WAS GREAT.

I really should ditch this idiotic IT job and go a-sailing in the deep blue sea.




Look! It's a bunch of people and a horse in close proximity to a ship

Labels: work

A cop pulls over a motorist and says "Your eyes are red. Have you been drinking?"

The motorist replies "Your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"



Donuts - is there anything they can't do?

Labels: funnies

Regardless of the ridiculous price tag of the PS3, it remains one of the most powerful video game consoles ever imagined. For example, it helps fights disease while idling. You could even build your own homegrown supercomputer with a cluster of PS3s.

So much for the days of wondering if your console investment will last a year or two before you toss it out.

For those of you who may have already forked over your life savings to procure this monstrosity, here's a link to save you the 10 year wait to see what's cooking inside: the gutted remains of a PlayStation 3.

Scott McNealy, Co-Founder and Chairman of Sun Microsystems had supposedly recently made a statement that "Technology has the shelf life of a banana". Given the limitations of Sun's research budget, their experts probably made the connection by actually attaching said fruit to each Server that came off the production line. Of course, in my opinion most of Sun's Servers are obsolete even before they come off the production line. Anyway.

In a tangential deviation from the topic, I think Preity Zinta has big knockers:



Stoking the fires of lust in adolescents everywhere!


Then again, I guess that's preity obvious.

Labels: technology

...but this is silly.




Han Solo never looked so good


Another worthy addition to the timeless traditions of holy matrimony:



Strike her down now, or forever hold your peace

Labels: general

It's very easy, according to our experts. These are the same bunch of idiots that have documented sales cycles for different sectors and verticals, have laid out explicit processes to help you formalise the cycle and bombard you with tips on "how to sell faster". Obviously, they’ve never been to our beloved resplendent isle.

Case in point: A small-medium sized Services engagement at a large insurance company, very well known for innovation in their trade. I celebrate tomorrow, along with another poor, long suffering schmuck from a Business Partner whom I'll call "Rifle Boy" for reasons that are not obvious, the first anniversary of said opportunity.

For people who are not familiar with a sales cycle comprising of (1) identifying (2) qualifying (3) validating (4) proposal with conditional agreement and (5) closing, the time factors are kinda like this:

- Commodities such as PCs and Printers take about 2 weeks in total to close out
- Servers, and other configurable products a bit higher in value take about 2-3 months
- Solution Sales, which are designed based on customer requirements and are almost always unique take about 3-5 months
- Government tenders, the most bureaucratic system of all, take about 6-10 months at most

Following up on a deal for one whole year in an Enterprise sector account is a fucking eternity. I hate this economy and I hate the morons who run it.

What was the point of this post? I'm griping, alright? A healthy "up yours" to all concerned a long time ago would have spared me much aggravation. But what can I say? I'm a whore to my job. It screws me all the time, sometimes in kinky ways...but on a whole it’s rather like sodomy.

Also, it seems that Soylent Green is apparently People:


mmmm, soylent pizza

Labels: work

Actually,



Image shamelessly ripped off Uncyclopedia.

The (original) preview of the movie:

Labels: movies